The Golfer

Best of the World 2018

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"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-suited for the purpose." —Winston Churchill "Golf is a lot like sex. It's something you can enjoy all your life. And if you remain an amateur, you get to pick your own playing partners." —Jess Sweetser "Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the player well."—Dean Martin "The devil invented golf, so the least we can do is return the favor and cheat like hell when we play." —Mickey Mantle "You can talk to a fade, but a hook won't listen."—Lee Trevino "I won't say my golf is bad, but if I started growing tomatoes, they'd come up sliced." —Miller Barber "Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity and skill soured by a whiff of arrogance." —Alistair Cooke "The most exquisitely satisfying act in the world of golf is that of throwing a club. The full backswing, the delayed wrist action, the flowing follow- through are without parallel in sport." —Henry Longhurst "If profanity had any influence on the flight of the ball, the game would be played far better than it is." —Horace G. Hutchinson "If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." —Jack Lemmon "A golfer is someone with hoof and mouth disease. He hoofs it all day and mouths it all night." —Will Rogers "The hardest shot is a mashie at 90 yards from the green, where the ball has to be played against an oak tree, bounces back into a sand trap, hits a stone, bounces on the green and then rolls into the cup. The shot is so difficult I have only made it once." —Groucho Marx "If you want to take long walks, take long walks. If you want to hit things with a stick, hit things with a stick. But there's no excuse for combining the two." —Bob Hope Quotable quotes In their own words from the game

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